It’s good to be the King.


[Hi, readers! It has come to my attention that this design isn’t as original as I thought it was.  King Randor was wearing this exact same outfit in a digital comic.  I hadn’t seen it before I created this custom figure.  If I had based it on this comic art, I’d proudly brag about how well I nailed the design.  Instead I invite you to behold my pre(post?)cognitive wizard powers.]


Let’s face it.  To be a He-Man and the Masters of the Universe toy collector, you must have a sense of whimsy.  You have to be cool with green tigers and purple panthers as preferred modes of transportation.  And I do embrace the whimsy!  But even in a world where lobster-men, skunk-men (more on him later), two-headed WTF-men, and even a big pink bunny (he’s fuchsia!!) can all take orders from a day-glo skull-faced eeeevil overlord, I must admit even I have my limits.  For example, I still haven’t added Cy-Chop (he has scissors for hands, and no, it’s nowhere near as cool as Edward Scissorhands) or The Mighty Spector (yawn!) to my collection.  Yet.  Maybe eventually.  (Don’t judge.)

Another meager struggle for me has been King Randor, the father of Prince Adam/He-Man.  He’s an integral character, and my collection couldn’t be complete without him.  There’s just one problem.  He looks like Burger King.  It’s just the combination of red and blue, with those orange pants.  I haven’t purchased an armored Randor, but I did receive a Filmation Randor as part of my “figure of the month” subscription.  It’s a flawless representation of King Randor from the Filmation cartoon, right down to his orange tights and blue booties.
The King Randor I’ve been displaying with my collection was actually a statue that was based on his look from the revised cartoon released in the 2000’s by Mike Young Productions.  That Randor was all kinds of Ned Stark bad-assness!!  He was decked out in blue and brown, colors that don’t make me crave a cheeseburger with onion rings with one fry in it, not even a little bit.  My only problem with him is that he was more than a head shorter than the rest of the collection.  The entire 200X toyline is smaller in scale than the “MOTU Classics” line currently being produced.  I couldn’t have the King of Eternia standing so shrimpy amongst his royal subjects!
I finally decided to make my own Randor figure.  At first I simply planned to repaint armored Randor in 200X colors, but that big, gold cross on his chest made me want to call him “Battle Pope.”  I started looking for an alternate outfit fit for a King, and then it hit me.  He should wear the armor of his Eternian Army.  And that’s when I started putting together a recipe for “Battleground Randor” in my head.

I bought an Eternian Guard figure on Ebay.  I painted all his armor parts gold, and his bodysuit metallic blue.  I painted his hands and neck fleshtone.  I popped on the Filmation Randor head and painted the crown a matching gold.  His cape is from a DCUC El Dorado figure, painted brown.  I had to grind the weapon clips off the back of his armor so the cape would fit properly.  His boots and loincloth are a matching brown.  He borrowed the sword and staff from the 200X Randor statue.  It doesn’t match any canon versions of King Randor, but it blends in with my collection nicely.
BONUS ROUND: I said I’d mention more about skunk-men, and I’m not about to leave you wanting.  Stinkor is a classic MOTU villain whose superpower/gimmick is that he stinks like a skunk.  One day at, which is without a doubt the biggest online gathering of MOTU fans in the world, one brave member admitted that as a child, he loved the smell of his Stinkor figure.  Another followed and posted that he went as far as to sleep with his Stinkor figure under his pillow because he loved the smell so much.  This became a long list of true confessions from people who thought they were all alone in the world with their love of the scent of skunk.  I personally hadn’t seen (or smelled) my classic Stinkor figure in years, but I couldn’t remember ever recoiling from the stench.  Eventually, someone made it all clear.  Stinkor’s scent was actually patchouli!  The plastic of his waist-piece was infused with patchouli oil.  Another member said he recently pulled his Stinkor figure out of a box in the attic, and he still smelled as strong as he did when he was brand new!  Moss Man, whose superpower/gimmick was the scent of pine, had lost that “old car scent” long ago.

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