In our final PLAYING SANTA installment, Deane and Rod Keith treat themselves to a little holiday cheer.
Emphasis on little.
Deane: Bah Humbug.
Rod Keith: What’s that?
Deane: Bah Humbug. I’m sitting here, reading my METAL MEN DC COMICS ARCHIVES, looking at my MATTEL METAL MEN figures, and saying “Bah Humbug: they left out Doc Magnus”.
Rod Keith: Right! It’s hard to imagine that Doc Magnus, creator of the Metal Men, wasn’t included as a figure. Doc is a no-brainer, and even Toyguru has said that the Metal Men (like the Doom Patrol’s Chief) is incomplete without their leader. How hard would it have been to include him in the sub?
Deane: As the Ghost of MATTEL Subscriptions Past, I would say it was the cost of a new head sculpt.
Rod Keith: Alright, so here is my holiday gift to myself:
Rod Keith: Doc’s body is just a simple Black Mask suit buck (which is different than every other jacket we’ve had so far, btw). I trimmed off the clasp that holds the coat together, repainted the shirt and tie, and obviously the jacket. Oh, that tweed! Hands are from a MM Harvey Dent.
Deane: I’m so happy not to be seeing Aquaman’s or Superman’s noggin.
Rod Keith: Yes, Mr. Grinch: the head is from Matter Eater Lad, which I recognized at once, with that lop-sided smirk, that the crooked mouth might look okay with a pipe. It involved re-working the bulged-out cheek, and re-styling the hair. But, hey Mattel, it’s a suit buck, a pipe and a new head. It’s not like you have to build a sentient, elastic robot with responsometers or anything.
Rod Keith: As for the pipe, I was having trouble finding something that would work, but I just happened by pure chance to stumble upon a leftover from someone’s custom Minimate pile, a half-finished spider thing, of which the leg was part toothpick. I pulled it out, re-shaped the putty ‘joint’ into the bowl of the pipe. Lucky. I’m sure there are 1:12 dollhouse size pipes out there though.
Deane: For my Doc Magnus, I set my way-back machine to the DC Direct Metal Men PVC Set. A set so massive I had to take two pictures:
Rod Keith: But those figures are 8 cm high. What good is that going to do you?
Deane: My pipe is 1mm metal wire and a chunk of plastic sprue from a model car kit.
Rod Keith: Nice! What’s the Metal Men without their creator? Slightly less cool, that’s what!
Deane: Right! Almost done!
Rod Keith: Erm. There’s some figures missing in your picture.
Deane: No there aren’t: I’ve simply removed the figures that MATTEL made flawed.
Rod Keith: Oh, hasn’t this gone on long enough? It’s almost 2014?
Deane: Nonsense. Lead was never depicted as towering over his friends; Lead was portly. Also, Tin was never as diminutive as MATTEL sculpted him. I stand with the original classics. I need to make THREE MORE METAL MEN:
Rod Keith: There’s no helping you.
Deane: Don’t be ridiculous: You’re going to help hold the resin molds.
Rod Keith: Happy New Year, everyone!
Deane: Happy New Year, and may all your metals be bright!
A special METAL MEN salute to Anthony Clark for the use of his PVC figure!