Karaoke time!

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Go to Spotify or one of those cool services and find the karaoke versions of the following songs, then listen as you read:

King of Pain (The Police):

I’ll Always be Lois Lane

I was Perry White’s favorite reporter gal
And I travelled the world from Guam to Senegal
Then came a strange visitor to our world
The big lug took me flying; my toes curled

I was sent to find out about the big red “S”
So I took out my notebook and my best blue dress
But when I asked him questions I just could not think
And it left me all tongue-tied when he said “They’re pink.”

Superman and Clark Kent seem never to have met
(They are the same guy)
Superman says it hasn’t happened yet
(That’s ‘cause he’s Clark Kent)
Clark had the scoop; he seemed to know it all
(Don’t you understand?)
Who did he interview? Who did he call?
(Clark is Superman)

I have worked in the news since 1933
But now print is dead, so what becomes of me?
I could go get a job over at TMZ
But what they are to news raw sewage is to tea

He’s fought Terra-Man, Toyman, and Bizarro too
(Save us Superman)
He was split into Superman Red and Blue
(2 x Superman)
There’s a genius from space who wants to shrink our town
(Save us Superman)
There’s a purple-clad killer grinning like a clown
(No, he fights Batman)

Whenever Superman shows up, Clark Kent disappears
That guy’s one walking phobia, he’s filled with fears
Superman fights Titano, grabs him by the ears
And Metropolis loves him, fills the air with cheers

He’s the Man of Tomorrow, he’s the Action Ace
From the late planet Krypton; it blew up in space
I have been to his Fortress of Solitude
And the name of the woman who got him nude?
Lois Lane

There’s a redheaded girlfriend from his Smallville youth
(Lose her, Superman)
She’s a pain in the neck, if you must know the truth
(Lose her, Superman)
But I have a plan though it’s a bit uncouth
Seal her up inside a telephone booth

He’s had Lori Lemaris, whose fishtail left a stain
He’s been Lyla Lerrollin’ and Luma Lynai-in’
Enough double-L women to drive me insane
But it’s his destiny to be with Lois Lane

Lois Lane Lois Lane Lois Lane
I’ll always be Lois Lane
I’ll always be Lois Lane
I’ll always be Lois Lane…

Fat Bottomed Girls (Queen–you’ll see why):

Fishnetted Girls

Are we gonna join the League tonight?
Whip the Key and Ultra-Humanite?
Are we gonna take Despero out?
Fishnetted girls you help the Justice League get down
Hey I was just a millionaire
Shipwrecked someplace God knows where
But I came back the greatest archer sea to sea
Got hooked up with Black Canary
Never thought I’d want to marry
Black belt woman you made a Leaguer out of me
Hey hey
Been patrolling with my crew
Speedy and Green Lantern too
We were hard trav’lin’ heroes glad to say
But society of just men
Kinda sucked, it soon grew thin
Bring me back the Leaguer ladies every time
C’mon oh won’t you put your stockings on
Oh it’s the purpose of this song
Oh and when you throw that judo chop
Fishnetted girls you help the Justice League get down
Fishnetted girls you make the fanboy world go round
Hey listen here now Black Canary ain’t alone
Zatanna also has ‘em on
But she can wipe your memory like a slate
So I’d rather get my pleasure
From Dinah Lance’s treasure
Than be sent to live in a tower with Dr. Fate
Now get this
Oh I know we’re gonna fight that Shaggy Man
Oh like a big orangutan
Are we gonna meet ol’ Adam Strange
Fishnetted girls you make the satellite go round
Fishnetted girls you make the watchtower boys so proud
Hear that Canary Cry!

Refugee (Tom Petty):

Just Wanna Be in the Justice League

I’ve had powers I’ve had costumes
Off and on I’ve been a hero
Cub reporter for the Planet
But the League thinks I’m a zero

Listen
I could join as Mr. Action
But I don’t think I will get satisfaction
See I just want to be in the Justice League
(he just wants to be in the Justice League)

Robots, villains, aliens
All of them have been members
Giant Turtle Olsen is all anyone remembers

Don’t care what my super-powers may be
Don’t want no watch that just goes zee-zee-zee
You see I just want to be in the Justice League
(he just wants to be in the Justice League)
Yeah baby I just want to be in the Justice League

Hey, I’m Superman’s pal
Couldn’t be closer unless I was a gal
I think the Leaguers all must be nuts
They let Snapper Carr in, baby, that guy’s a putz

Darkseid, Cadmus, Lex Luthor, I’ve been there for the big ones
But still the Justice League ignores me
Don’t think I’ll ever be one of the big guns

Honey I could be Elastic Lad
Even Porcupine Olsen wouldn’t be too bad
‘Cause see I just want to be in the Justice League
The red-headed Beatle of 1000 B.C.
Flamebird, gorilla, werewolf, Viking, why not me?

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